Victory Road IC Inbox

[pkemeter]

"You have reached Dr. Egon Spengler. Please leave a message, preferably fifty words or less."

Comments

[neverstudied]

Nah, I'm pretty sure I'd punch the other me in the dick if I met him. Even if it turns out he did have good reasons for being the way he is.

'Course, Ray. Always will be. [He winks.] You can't get rid of us if you tried.

... Now, if we're all done thinking about our tragic backstories, all in favor of talking about something else? Like, Egon still doesn't know all about the ghosts we've had to deal with, and vice versa.

[pkemeter]

[After a moment of hesitation to glance towards the other tables, Egon leans forward to kiss Ray on the cheek before pulling his hand away. He goes to eat the rest of his abandoned sandwich.]

Aye. [He takes a bite.] You appear to have dealt with various supernatural phenomena that do not entirely relate to ghosts or spirits. I was wondering if you could tell me about those cases and how you dealt with them.

[ghoststanning]

[Ray smiles at the kiss, and gently touches his face afterwards.]

Spengs told me about how they had a run in with this Vigo character! I gotta say, from what he’s told me, I think we have a strong contender to beat the chicken guy for dumbest plan. It seems like his entire plan was to possess a baby? Egon, you sure you have no idea what his plan beyond that was?

[neverstudied]

Ray, nothing can beat chicken guy. Chicken guy got the power to make anything he wanted disappear or reappear just so that poor demon could save face, and he still just wanted to eliminate chickens and nothing else.

And then we tricked him with robotic chickens.

[pkemeter]

Robotic chickens. Demons being embarassed by chickens only further points towards my theory that any higher being that exists and may or may not be God may be a chicken.

[Stated in an incredibly flat tone.]

Well, that wasn't his only plan. He intended to use the psychoreactive slime under the city to somehow gain control over the population. However, we were able to weaponize it against him and neutralize him effectively. I am unsure whether he expected the slime to be positively charged, given the general attitude of New Yorkers.

[ghoststanning]

... Okay I guess Vigo isn’t as bad as the chicken guy.

[Sorry chicken man.]

Oh yeah I almost forgot about the slime! Knowing the state New York usually is in our dimension, I’m betting he didn’t expect it to be positively charged at all. Still it’s a shame I wasn’t able to see the slime myself!

[neverstudied]

... Ok, tell me more about this slime again. Because I know we told you about the slime that coats the pillar of Manhattan, and how that leaked into the sewer system once, and I still don't get how there's two separate supernatural slime sources in the sewer system, completely independent of each other.

At least, I assume they're separate. Ray, you and the other Egon would've noticed if that slime had, uh, psycho-reactive tendencies, right?

[pkemeter]

I believe the slime had been placed in the sewer system several hundred years earlier by worshipers of Gozer. Once the slime had grown in volume and become charged with negative psychokinetic energy, Vigo noticed this and decided to utilize it for his plan. [He shrugs.] Waiting for hundreds of years in slumber did nothing to help him--he should've spent more time studying the effects of the slime.

[He puts his fork down and glances towards Ray.] We did perform a few experiments regarding how it reacted to differing emotional states, both negative and positive. For example, insulting it, regardless of the speaker's tone, would cause it to react, although yelling usually caused it to react more violently.

[ghoststanning]

I'm pretty sure the Mood Slime is an entirely different thing, since I have no idea why worshipers of Gozer would want to build a support beam like that that would stop giant earthquakes from happening. And while it could have some minor psycho-reactive power, it doesn't seem to be nearly on the same level, anyway.

...

You know you got really quiet when I asked about the experiments earlier, Spengs. What was that about?

[neverstudied]

Fair enough, but still, two different sewer slimes? Maybe they came from the same place initially, and developed different niche uses, and were utilized by different people. I dunno.

Huh. So you guys wound up screaming at slime for science.

[Despite this Venkman's dislike of his other self, there's a great deal of similarity between the two. They both love their partners, though one is better at showing it. They both have similar senses of humor, though one takes jokes too far sometimes. They both take pride in their public appearance and overemphasize their own importance, and it's hard to tell if either of them are as egotistical as they act.

But more than anything, they both seem to have a knack for knowing when a conversation is going to end in them getting to make fun of their partners, and they both love to take advantage of that. To the point that somehow, some way, Venkman winds up briefly echoing his own alternate self word-for-word.]

What kinda tests did you try for the positive reactions?

[pkemeter]

I would not discount the theory of evolutionary slime.

[Egon's body language stiffens ever so slightly--something only really noticeable to the people who've spent years around him. Or at least, someone who's spent time around some version of Egon Spengler.]

We exposed it to music and songs, gave it nurturing, supportive words. [He clears his throat.] Ray...mostly handled that aspect.

[He attempts to pick up his fork and start working on another piece of cake.]

[ghoststanning]

[Hm, well Egon's getting weird about it again, but so far it just seems like normal things to him?]

Yeah! Spengs told me already that it responds especially well with the song "Higher and Higher".

Apparently we used it to control the Statue of Liberty

[neverstudied]

[Venkman's eyes narrow ever so slightly. He damn well noticed that change in posture, Egon. Tread carefully.]

What, you didn't want to sweet-talk the mood slime, Egon?

... We did what with the Statue of Liberty.

[That manages to briefly distract Venkman from examining Egon further, at least. But it won't work for long.]

[pkemeter]

[Egon pointedly avoids answering that first question, deciding instead to focus on the way this particular slice of cake is structured.]

We coated the Statue of Liberty in positively-charged psychokinetic slime and played "Higher and Higher" at an extremely high volume, which allowed the structure to self-mobilize.

[They've used too many eggs in this--the texture is far too close. Interesting.]

[ghoststanning]

Whaddya say, Pete? You think that's weirder than the chicken man?

[Hey if Ray distracts Peter enough, he may accidentally help draw him away from the slime stuff.

...Maybe.]

[neverstudied]

Maybe a little weirder.

[It's rare for Venkman to concede so easily, but Egon is practically dissecting that cake on the table like a science class frog, and he wants to know why.]

Egon. Tell us more about the experiments.

[pkemeter]

[Egon stabs the fork directly through the cake, still pointedly avoiding meeting Venkman's (or Ray's) eyes.]

I don't see what else there is to speak on the matter. We tested the slime for emotional reactions, and were able to draw a conclusion on its psychokinetic make up.

[He starts picking apart the cake without bothering to even eat it.]

And what about the chicken man? How exactly was he able to make a deal with a demon in the first place?

[ghoststanning]

I’m pretty sure he just performed the standard demon summoning ritual where he gains something in exchange for his soul.

[Ray looks over at Venkman. Yeah, he’s really starting to notice how weird Egon is being too, and while he’s not fueled by being a jerk, he’s still really curious about what’s going on.]

You alright, Spengs? The way you’ve been reacting whenever we bring up the slime really makes it sound like something happened during the experiment.

[neverstudied]

[Excuse you, Venkman is entirely motivated by non-bastard reasons. Definitely]

Hey, Dr. Spengler, you can stop the cake autopsy any time now. And there's plenty to "speak about on the matter". Don't you usually like it when I ask questions and provide actual feedback about your experiments? You got a reason for clamming up right now, Egie?

[pkemeter]

[Egon stops taking apart the cake. But he still doesn't look up at either of them. He rests the fork on the plate and folds his hands together, appearing oddly contemplative.

After an uncomfortable pause, he says--]

Perhaps we should speak some more about your experiences.

[That's...all.]

[ghoststanning]

[Should he be concerned? He feels concerned.]

... Spengs, did something happen? You can tell us; we’re here for you.

[neverstudied]

[There's a part of Venkman that's concerned, too, even though his gut tells him it's not anything genuinely horrible. Just something Egon finds embarrassing and is reluctant to talk about.]

Is it something you don't wanna say out loud in public?

[He thinks it over for a moment. And then, like another version of himself before him, Venkman tries to make a joke- in this case to cut the tension.]

C'mon, it's not like you were sleepin' with it, were you?

[God help us.]

[pkemeter]

[Now that gets Spengler to react. His hand jerks and causes his fork to clatter against his plate. His face turns a distinct shade of red as he clears his throat and looks away from both of them.

There's your answer, Venkman.]

[ghoststanning]

[At first, Ray is concerned by that reaction. Since he was slightly worried that something bad happened during the experiment, he couldn’t help but take his reaction as a bad sign. What did it mean? What could have been so bad that-

And then the joke Venkman made hits him and it clicks.]

Oh.

[And then-]

Did I-?

[Ray quickly cuts himself off, however, because he realizes that there no graceful way to say “HEY DID I WATCH YOU FUCK SLIME?!”]

[neverstudied]

[There is a long, long moment of silence as Venkman accurately interprets every single detail of Egon's reaction.]

Oh my God.

Oh my God.

[And then, he looks at Ray, grinning like an idiot.]

Didn't even take me a week, Ray, how about that for efficiency?

[And then, back to Egon-]

Ok, so, give us the details. Was the other Ray there when this happened? I need to know if I can hold this over both of you, or just you.

[This is Christmas morning for him rn he is delighted]